And just so y’all don’t think I only pick on my oldest (Princess. Remember her?) 
let me tell you a little story about Girlfriend.
Girlfriend is super. She’s cool. She’s fun. She slips under your radar like nobody’s bidness. She also has problems finding her way out of her room each morning.
That’s not to say she isn’t smart. Girlfriend has some crazy talent with the words and the numbers. She just…embraces her inner ditz like you wouldn’t believe.
She hasn’t quite reached the intolerable teens. It doesn’t take much effort to like her, but I see signs of trouble ahead.
Me: Girlfriend, you left the door to the garage open.
Girlfriend: I did?
Me: Yeah. (Unspoken implication being CLOSE THE DAMN DOOR! WHAT? DO WE OWN THE ELECTRIC COMPANY NOW?!)
Girlfriend: Oh! Right!! I should close it.
I watch her walk by it three times without closing it. It’s obvious she’s trying to remember why she’s in this part of the house when just a minute ago she was elsewhere. How did I get here? I’m hungry for grapes—oooh, shiny thing!
Me: Girlfriend!! The door!!
Girlfriend ducks like a random door is suddenly being hurtled through the air towards her. Catlike reflexes. Did I mention that she’s an athlete?
Me: CLOSE IT!!
She smiles the smile of the simple-minded “Oh yeaaaahhhhh,” and closes it.
Girlfriend: Did you know that you can cut a pie into 8 pieces with only 3 slices?
Yeah.
I know.
Me, too.
right now this is me
leaving comments on your blog
but for what reason
You speak in riddles
But I see through your Haiku
This is your reason.
A bad Twitter night
Why do I do battle with
Poli twidiots?
Don’t know what that is
And why are you Spam I am
All over again?
IT”S SO DAMNED ANNOYING!!!!!!!!!!! I can’t use Notification. I have to click on each individual blog comment unless it’s on my own blog. And judging from PMAO, it’s still doing it, no matter if I’ve been commenting there for a long time.
That wasn’t in proper Haiku form.
That was freestyle.
Damn damn damn damn damn
Damn damn damn damn damn damn damn
Damn damn damn damn damn
Much better!
Good form – your command of the single syllable word is extraordinary!
Hey – we’re on the same team! Truce until then? Save it for the clown.
Though, this is the main reason I chose you. You’re pretty good at this.
Sigh.
Agreed.
I will be serving Mr. Clown some GingerSnaap snark later this evening or tomorrow afternoon. In Columbus right now.
Hooray. Short North? Easton Town Center?
Neither.
Craft show- Ohio Village.
Mr Clown likes you.
Snort.
It’s pretty obvious that he craves attention from me.
Ummmm, ya think?!?!
Holy Moly- I had no idea just how much he wants your attention until today. I bet he’s a woman! Lolzzz.
You should say this on my or Clown’s blogs!
I will say it in my Blog post-due out in Major Motion Picture sometime in the next 24 hours.
I’ll tell you – I think a comment or two of mine went to his spam folder.
I feel like we’re having a secret Spy meeting. Are we a terrorist group now?
And WHY in the hell are you still hanging around in the spam folder??
I don’t know, but it’s pissing me off.
Now Edward, in my therapy sessions we learn that “it” cannot piss us off, but rather we choose to give the “it” power thus making the “it” into some psycho babble bullshit that I just paid $125 an hour to hear.
Understand?
Know what would be fun for you? Do all you can for an entire session to try to piss the shrink off. When they finally react, point out that they are choosing to give your actions power over them. And then keep doing it until a few weeks after your point is made. You will feel so much better!
Wait a minute – you already do that with me for free…
Should I just send you the $125, then?
And? You have grey hair. In your sideburns. Yup.
Shit! I forgot about our ‘truce’.
Nevermind.
Yes – send me the money, and I’ll make your life better. Calling Dr. Hotspur!
I do have gray – 50 shades of it.
DAMMIT!!!!!!!
Dammit again
DammIT MadTim! MitDam! Admimt! Tadmim! Idmamt!
Hold yourself together,man! Save your anger for the Duel!